The Kinky Grad

pinkiemachine:

Feeling in the mood for some Bat Fam? 🥰

seaenemyysquared:

people who are allowed in the kitchen:

• alfred - can actually cook, a responsible adult, does not set things on fire
• jason - chef connoisseur, actually uses cooking utensils properly, does not set things on fire
• damian - helps cook every time unprompted unless told not to, has deemed the kitchen sacred and will not reach for the kitchen knives (warning: this does not mean he doesn’t have any of his personal knives on hand)
• tim - doesn’t cook but will if forced/bribed to, only mildly chars things on occasion (warning: if you want tim to make you something specific have blackmail you’re willing to give up)

people who aren’t allowed in the kitchen unsupervised:

• steph - can only make mac n cheese and waffles alone, has short circuited the toaster 5 times and broken the microwave door (warning: if you find purple food dye at any visible point in the kitchen tell alfred immediately)
• cass - will only bake cookies and serve them as meals, does not comprehend the aspect of cooking, will make her own rules
• duke - has and will miss measure something which will subsequently create a science experiment (see: the 2 tblsp of salt incident)

people who are permanently banned from the kitchen:

• dick - will actively turn cooking into a science class on purpose, has and will blow up the kitchen (see: confetti cake marmalade acid incident)
• bruce - cannot cook for the life of him swear to god the man lights water on fire do not let him lay a single cursed finger on any surface past the dining room

side notes:

• if alfred says he is making waffles immediately get jason. does not matter how you do it, he is your only hope.
• if you hear tim screaming in the kitchen don’t go check on him. everything is fine, screaming just makes him feel like he has a sense of control. he will get over it in 30 seconds.
• vegetarian alternatives will always be made on damians behalf. you will less likely be threatened at knife point if you ask what he would like.
• If you hear fergie or britney spears anywhere in the manor there is a 90% chance of dick being in the kitchen. get him out.

strrawberrryjam:

cosmicanger:

How I’m trying to be this summer.

(via cracklebucket666)

thefoundationproject:

afriendstolovers:

!!!!!!!

Yes.

(via thepeanutbutterwizard)

my-cabin-life-pacific-nw:

(via thediaperedboy)

diaperedlittleme:

Diapers and video games anyone 🎮

(via thediaperedboy)

whydidisavethistomyphone:

(via luxmanning)

weaver-z:

weaver-z:

weaver-z:

The DCEU is so funny to me, because you would have to be eating paste and huffing tar to fumble a franchise with the popularity and weight of DC Comics, but the executives at Warner Bros gave the reins of the franchise to Zack “God’s Strongest Accidental Fascist” Snyder and let him just slowly wedge the franchise into a complete standstill like Austin Powers on that luggage cart

Christopher Nolan made a Batman movie so good that it snagged nine Oscar nominations and won two. All DC had to do was restructure some scripts from Justice League Unlimited, and they’d keep the ball rolling forever. But no, every day Warner Brothers and Zack Snyder clocked into work at the Fumbling the Bag Factory and aimed to be employee of the month, and now The Flash movie is slated to make less than ANY of the movies featuring Quicksilver, who is literally The Flash but in Blue. And to this day the only thing I know about The Flash is that Ezra Miller puts a baby in the microwave.

This clip is edited a bit, and the context makes it marginally less bizarre, but the gif is so much funnier if you see it like this that I’ve just decided to present it without explanation.

(via awkwardgaydude)